Making the INCREDIBLE the INEVITABLE: Why You Need to Practice Until You Cannot Get it Wrong

So, a few days ago, I saw a this Gatorade commercial on TV.

You say "insane", I say "I train"

You say "freakish", I say "frequent"

You say "ridiculous", I say "meticulous"

You say "incredible", I say "inevitable"

Something about this video just stuck with me.   So much, in fact, that it inspired an entire post (which you are reading this very second).  

I think a lot of times we see something amazing, like a person walking a tightrope across two buildings or someone who swallows swords without a single injury.  We see football teams make amazing catches that require forty thousand replays.  We wallow in the wonder of these incredible individuals.   Such the same is for horses,

But, while these acts and amazing rides are quite incredible, they all have something in common: they were inevitable.   Someone, somewhere worked and practiced until they couldn't get it wrong.   Until the incredible was inevitable.   Sometimes we get so jealous of others that are seemingly "perfect" that we fail to realize that this was not a fluke, or some stroke of amazing luck.   This was carefully crafted in hot, scorching summers.  It was crafted in long, dark winters when no one else was around.   The shows, the performances--these are all just the public displays of this hard work.  

We won't all be perfect.   I know I won't be.  I have a list of all the things I HAVE to improve on if I want to be as good as I can be.   But I am not waiting around for good luck to hand me a ribbon--I'm gonna work for it.   

Are You Ready to Work at the Barn?(Quiz)

With so many of our seasoned workers running off to college, our barn has been looking for workers to take the open shifts.   This decision should not be taken lightly, so I made a handy test that will let you know if you have what it takes to work at the barn.  

Here's how this works:  For every "yes" you answer, you get two points.   For every "no", you receive one point.  Add them up at the end and see how you do!

1. Can you tack up a horse without assistance?
• (2 points) YES
• (1 point) NO
2. Are you willing to work really, really hard?  Even when it is raining and you have to swim through the outdoor arena to feed the ponies?
• (2 points) YES
• (1 point) NO
3. Are you willing to take demands from instructors, clients, and diva-mare horses?
• (2 points) YES
• (1 point) NO
4. Have you made peace with the fact that you will always be covered in mud, hay, etc.  and that sometimes even after you shower, you will find hay in your hair---especially when you are out in public places?
• (2 points) YES
• (1 point) NO
5. Do you know where to locate the leftover cookies, popsicles, and three year old (but still good) camp candy?
• (2 points) YES
• (1 point) NO
6. Do you know of at least three hiding spots in the barn in case you want to avoid doing any kind of work?
• (2 points) YES
• (1 point) NO
7. Can you name at least three "no no pet" horses?
• (2 points) YES
• (1 point) NO
8. Are you willing to eat candy corn and Gatorade for dinner because you are too tired to fix (or pick up) food after working?
• (2 points) YES
• (1 point) NO
9. Have you prepared your mind and  body for a permanent state of exhaustion?
• (2 points) YES
• (1 point) NO
10. Are you willing to answer questions from children that include but are not limited to: Is it full grown? where's it's mom? Is it pregnant? is it a boy or a girl?
• (2 points) YES
• (1 point) NO

Now, calculate your results!   

20 points: WOW!  You are SO ready to work at the barn.  In fact, go on and put your work boots on and get to the barn right now.   

17-19 points:   You might not realize exactly what you are getting yourself into, and you might need a little help along the way, but you can be whipped into shape in no time.  

15-16 points:  You've got a long way to go, but I have faith in you.   Even though you have no idea what you're getting yourself into, I think if you brush up on your list of hiding spaces and no no pet horses you will be good to go.    

Less than 15 points:  No.   Just don't.  You are better off trying to help with the mechanical horse at Wal-mart than the real ones at the barn.... here's a quarter. 

Setting Examples... and Why it's Been So Quiet on the Blog

I am not going to lie... Summer show season 2016 hasn't gone exactly how I had planned.   I had high expectations after winning blue after blue at the winter tournaments, and I had some of those similar expectations for myself this summer.  After all, I would be competing against some of those same people.   It's been tough, but I still come to work my shifts.   I still show up the day after the show to practice.  There have been so many times I have felt like giving up, like no one believes in me, and that maybe this isn't "my thing" after all.   I had stopped writing for the blog, and instead started formulating my "speech" for why I wouldn't be coming to lessons anymore.   This is real talk, people.

But at the last show, something miraculous happened.  And no, I am not talking about a ribbon.   I am not even talking about how I had to finish the second class minus one front shoe.

Here's what happened:

I had been working all morning at the barn,  trying to preserve my makeup while getting all of the show horses brushed and tacked and ready to compete for the day.   I was tired before I even mounted my horse for the first class.   To me, this was just another "eh" show, with minimal expectations because I had done so horribly this summer at the other shows.  

But as I was leaving the warm up ring and heading to the outdoor arena, so many of the little children stopped and said "good luck" to me.  Their eyes were wide with excitement and I could tell that the well wishes were very much genuine.  I started to chortle my usual sarcastic "yeah I will need it".   But instead of my sarcasm, I smiled back and said thank you.  

When we were in the line up in the second class, all of the children were packed into the "crow's nest", the area where our announcer sits.   I saw them peek at the numbers of the winning entries and immediately saw jaws drop and huge smiles--and they were looking right at me.   It was at that moment that I realized how much the younger riders look to us older riders and parents and friends, and how much of an example we can be.   it is not fair to myself or to them to be negative.   Because at some point, if I keep being negative, the number of children wishing me luck will diminish to zero and all I will have accomplished is teaching others that you don't ever need to believe in yourself, especially when times are tough.  

I am not perfect, and I never will be.   I have faults--especially like when I ride around the arena like I am in a toilet bowl and accidentally forget to switch my whip when we reverse and sometimes I even lose my stirrups going into the lineup.  

When it comes to who is watching you, the judge isn't the only one who matters.

How Working at the Barn Will Make You A Better Rider

I am writing this blog post now, after working or riding or being with horses every day since I have been out of school (that's June 1)... except for maybe two days.   Today, I worked our annual non-profit HOOF (Horses Offering Opportunities for the Future) camp, and then I took a lesson today.  So. Much. Sweat.  I am exhausted.

But, even though I am exhausted, I will do it again and again.  Why?   Because working at the barn WILL make you a better rider.   Here's how.

1. Endurance.  If you are able to have a successful ride after working a blugillion hours at the barn, you will be able to handle any weather at a horse show.   We can't quit simply because we are tired.  We are not guaranteed 100% health on the day we show, so we have to prepare as best as we can.   By working, riding, and working some more, we are building muscles in our legs, arms, back, and even our little brains are getting a workout.  And guess what?  You can use those muscles while riding.  The barn is the ultimate workout, people!

2. Patience.  Sometimes, lessons don't start on time.  Sometimes, you are trying to help a child put away their horse and all you can think about is how you have five horses to get ready and only an hour to do it in.   Sometimes, forty people are telling you to do forty different things.  You have to be patient.  Not only when you work, but when you ride as well.  I don't get as frustrated as I used to when I am riding and a horse spooks--in fact, I find it hilarious and I try to be patient and understand that the horse is just trying to be a horse (which means hide from all real and imagined predators at all times).

3. Awareness.  One of the coolest things about working is that you get to see other people ride the horse(s) you ride.  Often times, I will watch lessons while I water, or as I am carrying tack to a horse's stall.  It's nice to see other riders (especially really skilled ones) ride a horse you ride; it helps you see what works and doesn't work and lets you apply that to your own riding.  It also lets you see how really dang cute your favorite horse is, which is also pretty nice.

4. Connection. The more time you spend with the horses, the more you get to know them and what makes them "tick".   There are horses in the barn that I can tell are extra grumpy without even getting close to the stall.  I can tell by the body language, the way they move around the stall, how alert they are, etc.   The more we know about a horse, the better we can ride it.

5. Appreciation.  Let me tell you, You appreciate a lesson 1000x more when you have to work for one.   I think I value every minute that I am in the saddle, because I know how hard I work to be able to ride as much as I do.    You do what you have to do for the things you love.  I think everyone at some point should have to work to pay for one lesson; it definitely gives you a better perspective.

5 Ways to Tell Your Barn/Lesson Workers "Thank You"

Since I have been out of school (I am a teacher), I think I have spent every day either working or riding (or both) at the barn... except for maybe like two days.  During this time, I've thought a lot about how hard a lot of us work at the barn, and I have felt so thankful for those people who find ways to say "thank you" to all of us who do our best to keep things running smoothly at the barn.   This post is mostly about the lesson workers (or "lesson helpers" or "working students" as they are sometimes called).   These kiddos often get overlooked and in my experience some of the hardest working people I have ever known.   So here it goes--in case you are wondering how you can say "thank you!"   

1. Clean up after yourself and your horse. I get it.  We are done riding, and especially in this super hot weather (the heat index has been close to 100), it is so tempting just to leave all of your saddles, blankets, etc. for someone else to pick up.  I will tell you, it means a LOT to us when you take the time to put everything away before you leave.   We don't even mind if you have to ask us where it goes, or ask us to help you.  That's what we're here for!

2. Arrive Early.  If you can.  Some of us have jobs that leave us racing to the barn, or we are stuck in traffic a mile long.  but if you can, come early.   I like to come early to get my own horse ready even when I am not working.  This not only helps the lesson workers, but it also gives me time to connect with my horse before the lesson.   Also, if you come early, it gives you time to check that the girth is fitted properly and make any last minute adjustments before your lesson.  When us workers tack up approximately 2948294890900 horses in one shift, mistakes DO happen and sometimes things need to be adjusted.  

3. Be patient.  Some shifts don't start until 4 and there will be a group of 7 horses going at 4:30.  We are doing the best we can.  In fact, when we are riding during our shifts, we will leave our own horse until last to ensure that YOUR lesson will start on time and your horse will be ready for when you arrive.   But life happens sometimes.   Sometimes, it takes 30 minutes to catch a horse in the field.  Sometimes, the electricity goes off in the middle of a lesson.  Sometimes, three unannounced riders show up.   We're doing the best we can.  I promise.

4. We like snacks... Just kidding.  Once, Betsy bribed us with a package of Oreos in exchange for cleaning tack.  I cleaned that tack SO HARD for those Oreos.  It was the best day ever.

5.  Say, "Thank you!" I love all of the riders who take time out of their day to thank us for getting their horse ready, or for turning them loose in the stall, or remembering to put their gear in a specific place.   It means a lot.

The 5 Stages of Getting Over A Really Bad Ride

Welp, this isn't a happy post, y'all.   I think I wouldn't be so hard on myself if I had truly done my best and had a clean ride and still lost--the competition was tough.   It's been a tough few weeks, and an even tougher weekend.   So here you go, people.  Here's how you get over a bad ride.

1. Cry.  Yep.  I've done that a lot this weekend.  No shame here.  Here is a list of all of the things I have cried about this weekend:
             1. Feeling like I let myself down.
             2. Feeling like I let my friends down.
             3. Feeling like I disappointed my instructor and that she will never want to coach me again because it isn't worth it.
             4. When I remembered all the bad things I did in front of the judge in both classes.
             5. Feeling embarrassed about #5.
             6. Thinking about what my instructor said after the class which also made me feel sad.
             7. Feeling like I will never be good enough or prepared enough.
             10. Wondering which horse I will have to ride next
             11. Thinking that nationals will probably not happen this year after my crapstorm debut.
             12. Knowing that no matter what anyone says, it WAS my fault.
             13. Knowing that I didn't do my best, no matter what anyone says.
             14. Thinking that I might have moved up to the WTC division too soon.
             15. Feeling bad because I blamed the horse for things that were my fault.
             16. Wishing that I had my own stupid horse to ride all the time for consistency
             17.  Feeling that all of the money and time that I spent was a waste.
     
2. Analyze.  What did you do differently that day?   I will tell you, I will never wear mismatched socks again. Did you visualize the ride?   Did you mentally and physically prepare yourself?   How did you warm up?   One thing I know was different is that because the classes were structured a little odd, I only got to trot around the warm-up ring once before going int he class.   I didn't get to canter, and I really felt unprepared (even though I shouldn't have been).

3. Take ownership.  Did the horse stop cantering?  what were you doing to ensure the next step was a canter? I admit, I don't think I was that focused. Did you pick up the wrong diagonal or the wrong lead?   It wasn't the horse's fault--you didn't pay attention enough to set him (or yourself) up correctly.  As much as we think so, the horses aren't out to get us.   We have to stop blaming others, blaming the weather, blaming the horse, and blaming the judge.  we need to look to ourselves to be better.  
       
4. Remember that you got EXACTLY what you paid for.  Not once on the sign-up sheet did it say that I was guaranteed anything.  The fee that I paid included board, transport, and entry and coaching fees. Ribbons are not included in this cost.  Remember that you are paying money for someone to judge you and rank you among the others in the group.

5. Ride. To be honest, I am not at that stage yet.  Right now, I think I am in stage 3 or 4, but I don't really know if I am ready to ride again.  I work on Tuesday, and even then I might not ask to ride.   This is the toughest thing to do.  Even when you do well at a show, the first ride back is always the hardest.   I am not sure why I feel this way, but it is especially tough to get back on and sit up straight and do it all over again.   But you do.

While you are saying "I CAN'T," someone else is saying "I CAN".

Let's just start this out by saying this:  I had a horrible ride on Thursday.  I mean, the kind that make you cry in the car on the way home, and question why you are even putting yourself though all of the stress in the first place.   I usually look forward to my Saturday morning shift at the barn, but even I was dreading it today.   I was in such a bad mood, I didn't even want to think about anything with hooves.

But I went to work anyway.  And somewhere along the way, I realized that I can choose to mope and blame the weather, or the horse, or the saddle, or my own (perceived) inabilities.  I absolutely have the freedom to choose to say "I can't".   No one is forcing me to do anything.   

But everyone has their own struggle.   Maybe it is a horse that won't walk, or a horse that will really only get the correct lead 60% of the time.  Struggles can be personal, like health  or family issues.   Either way, everyone is fighting some sort of a battle.  

So you can choose to say "I can't".   You can choose to say that the struggle is too great to overcome.  

But somewhere, someone else is looking at that same struggle and is saying "I can".   

By saying "I can", you do not guarantee yourself success.   By believing in yourself, you are not guaranteed the blue ribbon ride.   Sometimes, that horse will pick up the wrong lead in front of the judge.  It happens.   

But by saying "I can", you are giving yourself permission to succeed.  You are saying to yourself that success is possible, and even probable.   You are allowing yourself to dream bigger than before.   

And so I said "I can" today, and decided to ride that same horse that I rode two days ago.  I didn't want to wait until my normal lesson tomorrow, because I didn't want this negativity to take up any more of my time.   

And I succeeded.   It wasn't perfect, but it was a vast improvement from a couple of days ago.  but I succeeded because I gave myself permission to do so.  I didn't let the "I can't" take control.   

Does this mean that I will only be blessed with good rides?   Probably not.   I can guarantee that at some point between now and the show I will come galloping through the center of the ring just trying to keep my life together.   But I can guarantee that I will also have good rides, too.  

Because right now, the only four words in my vocabulary are:

                 I can.   

                 Whoa, walk.